Have you ever met a man that was tall, dark and handsome. He had all the right moves, said all the right things in this buttery deep voice and a good sense of humor. He was well dressed and had come into our office several times so when he asked me out I felt comfortable saying yes and making a plan.
I had this unique Dating App to thank for as it is through this platform that I would go out on my very first date and I was unable to suppress the exhilaration and excitement that was going through me that day and I hoped that my man would also be feeling the same.
Of course, I was excited about this first date and hoping this guy liked me and was a good guy. What I mean by good guy is a “relationship type guy” not a “hit it and quit it type guy”. I can pretty much weed out the “hit it type” from the get go or they reveal their hand in the date and that’s over that minute (i.e. no hit it, I just quit it).
He was dressed well and met me at my place of business near my vehicle. We drove to one of the best and most beautiful seafood restaurants on the coast just about sunset. It was a cool evening, the sky and the sea were beautiful and though he did not say much, it started pretty perfect.
We were greeting by a sweet hostess and led to a window table with white linen table cloth and candle light. He pulled out my chair and made sure I was comfortable. He requested a nice wine and water of course. The evening seemed to be off to a great start. We were served the wine and tasted it, approved it and viewed the menu for our orders. Being the “gentleman” he advised me to order anything, everything on the menu and being the “lady” I ordered something modest. Still going well.
I excused myself to wash my hands, powder my nose or whatever we ladies do in the “ladies” room and returned to the table. What I found was the same man (just a different version), jacket off, tie off, shirt open, half the bottle of wine gone (he must have guzzled because I was only gone for a few minutes). This man was loud, REALLY LOUD! This man was chomping bread, smacking with his mouth open, REALLY LOUD! This man was talking and spitting food and REALLY LOUD! This man was not only talking about inappropriate things at the dinner table, on a first date but was also spitting food all over the table and did I mention, REALLY LOUD! I was mortified and attempting to be sweet and keep my tone very quiet hoping he would get the hint. I thought maybe he is trying to end the date so I asked if we should go. He was indignant and thought everything was going really well. He said, “I really like you” to my dismay. I looked around to find every table in the restaurant was looking at him, at me, thinking we were an “us”. Oh my God! I was melting with humility. Couples at other tables were looking at me and it was as if their eyes were saying, “RUN!” Everything in me said RUN! Forget the fight or flight, I just wanted flight. This meal took forever…it felt like a lifetime. I could not wait to be done with this dinner so I could get the hell out of here and away from him. The waitress lip synced in silence, “I’m sorry”. She could tell this was a first date and that I had to play nice to get back to my car.
When the dinner was and thank God it was over, I ran. I told him I had a headache which was true after listening to him for over an hour. When we got back to my office I bolted from his car, I ran to my car with some excuse that I had a friend in need and was late. I ran to my car and had to get away. This was a disaster and he thought it went well and was surprised that I did not. Sometimes the whole world can see a problem that the person with that problem never sees. This was one of those times.
What I learned from this date was always take my car on a first date (in other words meet them there). Always make sure it’s a drink and by the way, guard your drink (keep an eye on it), there are some less savory people out there. Always have a back-up plan (get away quickly plan). However, have fun on the date if you can, it’s a time out and could turn out to be something good.